What’s On the Cannabis Menu?
Photo Credit: Kaya Collective
What is on the cannabis menu tonight? There is so much to look at when going into a cannabis dispensary it is tough to decide where to start. You have never been into a cannabis shop, you have been waiting in line for half an hour, and now you are at the counter. Although you have looked at the menu since you walked in you are so overwhelmed by what you are looking at you have no idea what to choose. What does ten milligrams mean, conversely why are some things one hundred milligrams? You have smoked weed for years but since you have lived in an area of the country where this stuff is illegal there is no way to figure what a milligram is in this retail marijuana establishment. Some of the strains of cannabis say twenty-one percent THC, but others say thirty percent THC. Now you finally get to the counter and the friendly budtender in front of you asks you what you would like. The only thing you can manage to mutter out is, “this is my first time in a dispensary and I have no idea what to get”.
Do not feel weird, everyone has that same feeling when they first walk into a dispensary. That is why budtenders exist. Some may think our job is easy and could be done by a vending machine. They may be right and one day we might be replaced by machines like the majority of our workforce. However, right now we are here to answer your questions, consult with you, and evaluate your needs to determine the best options available. It is also alright to not have any idea what you want to get. Luckily for you, I have tried everything on the menu. Someone must do it and luckily you are talking to the guy who has.
Gummies, if you have tried one you have tried them all. The state of Colorado has created a serving size of ten milligrams as the maximum potency for one, single edible. Ten milligrams is enough to feel something, to take the edge off but certainly not enough to overwhelm or make you uncomfortable. Now that goes for everyone, whether it is grandma who has never tried this stuff or it is the heady bro that smokes all day every day and only needs a vending machine as a budtender. There is a good deal of gummy companies out on the market right now but between the main ones you have got Cheeba Chew Green Hornets, Highly Edible, Wana, Americanna, and to a lesser extent you have got Incredibles and Edi Pure. Highly Edible are the best because of the effect they give you, along with their organic ingredients which include no corn syrup, and they have tons of flavors offered. However, Wana may be the overall favorite because they are very sugary and very sour, they are the sour patch kid of the edible world. Americanna, although a good product really is not that great because I swear every time I open their container up it smells like isopropyl alcohol. It most likely has something to do with their extraction process. Green Hornets are like eating a jelly slab and I am not a huge fan of that but since they are made by Cheeba Chew you will have an enjoyable buzz to play around in. Incredibles make great chocolates but their gummies still need a little work and Edi Pure may not even be a company anymore. They have pissed off so many people in this industry with their ethics it is tough to find their products anymore. They make a decent gummy though.
The next option for the edible menu may be to look at the chocolate bars. There are so many chocolate bars out there these days that I cannot even bother to mention all of them. The best option on the market though is the Incredibles company. They have an affordable price, they offer tasty flavors, and they have a proven track record. I highly recommend the Peanut Butter Buddha or the Boulder Bar. Certain companies like Coda, Bhang, and Binske are good options to look into as well, but their stuff tends to be a little pricier and for that reason makes it hard to buy on a first-time visit. I mean, one does not need to spend thirty dollars on a chocolate bar. Who cares where the chocolate comes from, if that matters go to a proper chocolatier and buy one without THC for five dollars.
Let us move on to the baked items, Love’s Oven and Sweet Grass being the big ones of the bunch here. Love’s Oven stretches themselves too thin, they make too many products that just sit on the shelf, but their brownies and chocolate chip cookies are magical. Sweet Grass, in my opinion, always seems to taste stale so I tend to avoid their products. Their peanut butter and jelly muffins are worth as are their seasonal pies which are always a hit. New company’s pop up all the time that make baked goods, honestly a company who is fairly new to Colorado called Zoots makes some really incredible single serve brownies.
If you are looking for hard candies, check out a company called Zoots. I like Zoots for a couple of reasons. First off, they taste good and they do not have any sugar. They are served in five-milligram doses so it makes the high pretty mellow and just takes the edge off. The buzz they offer is calm yet functional. If someone needs to take doses of THC while focusing this would be a good company to consider. They also offer a handy little container that fits in your pocket better than most edible packaging. If you want to have something instead of a piece of candy that does not contain chocolate, sugar, caffeine, etc then try a little tablet. Stratos and Altus are two decent options. I like the Stratos brand a little better, but everyone builds up a tolerance after a bit.
Some honorable mentions would include Cheeba Chews, Cannapunch, Dutch Girl Waffle Cookies, and Keef Colas. In all honesty though folks, edibles are all pretty good. Everything must be dosed out in the same serving sizes and it really just comes down to what type of snacks you would like to eat. Due to how cannabis laws were written it is impossible to get something more than one hundred milligrams in one package, and any single dose is not going to be more than ten milligrams. If you want to find some high-end edible brands that are not found in every shop check out The Ganja Gourmet, Simply Pure, Julie’s Natural Edibles, and Sweet Mary Janes. They offer some treats that are not just your average snack.
It is also a good idea to remember that the police in Colorado are not looking to arrest or fine anyone using marijuana. At this point they have much better ways to spend their time, they do not want to bust someone for doing something that is perfectly legal. So, do not worry, you are in Colorado. You have entered a higher state, enjoy it, and get blazed on your snacks.
Cannabis products are designed for adults 21 and older. Please consume responsibly.
